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Submitted by: Gath

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20/Oct/19 12:01 AM
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Why did the musician give his daughters the same name?
So he could yell 'Anna 1, Anna 2!'
20/Oct/19 12:03 AM
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Jack goes to his buddy Bob and says ... 'I'm sleeping with the priest's wife. Can you hold him in church for an hour after mass for me?'
The friend doesn't like it but being a buddy, he agrees. After mass,

Bob starts talking to the priest, More...
20/Oct/19 12:04 AM
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Two little boys stole a big bag of oranges from a neighbor and decided to go to a quiet place to share the lot equally. One of them suggested the nearby cemetery. As they were jumping over the gate to enter the cemetery, two oranges fell out of the big bag More...
20/Oct/19 12:07 AM
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Someone just asked me, 'Who do you think will win the 2020 Presidential Election?'
I said, I don't know, I don't have 2020 vision.
20/Oct/19 12:13 AM
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My Dear Ms.or Mr Phantom: I LOVE Mr. Cee's jokes. My comment yesterday was in reference to my miserable Sudoku puzzle time and experience (much like today's 2:17) that I thoughtlessly posted (like today, presumably) in the middle of Mr. Cee's comment stream. My profound apologies to him and everyone else for my carelessness. Good Morning, all!
20/Oct/19 12:14 AM
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An employee gets called into his boss’s office...
Boss: “Young man, you have risen very fast in this company. Two years ago, you began as an office boy. In a couple of months, you were a clerk. Then, you became a salesman, after that assistant manager, then More...
20/Oct/19 12:16 AM
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Morning Tom,

Takes a bit to sort the acceptable jokes from the inappropriate ones (Naughty corner ones) or the ones that will offend the Tribal political folk.

Glad you enjoy the humor.
20/Oct/19 12:19 AM
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Mr. Cee & Tom & all to follow! Not quite done with cpu xfer, but still stayed in bed till a normal time.
20/Oct/19 1:20 AM
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I wish I'd been able to stay in bed this morning. I was out the door at 6:30 AM. It was still dark. I was setting up for a yard sale. Believe it or not, people were there at 7. It was just getting light. We kept More...
20/Oct/19 2:09 AM
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At least when I got home I was able to work at solving the Wonderful Wombat Team poozle. Calmed me right down. Better than a tranquilizer.
20/Oct/19 2:12 AM
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''I have a split personality'', said Tom, being frank.
20/Oct/19 2:13 AM
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Sitting in the Columbia SC airport awaiting a flight to Ft. Worth TX. Going to see my brother and his wife. Will be gone for 5 days. I will post when I can.
20/Oct/19 2:28 AM
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Morning. Safe travels Hal.
20/Oct/19 3:41 AM
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20/Oct/19 4:02 AM
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Safe travels, Hal.

Family 'together time' is good...
20/Oct/19 4:34 AM
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Guess I should learn to renew the page, before posting.
20/Oct/19 4:37 AM
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I have family in Ft. Worth, Hal. I love the city. It's big but not overwhelming, and small enough to get around easily. Great food, too.

Have fun!
20/Oct/19 4:40 AM
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To our latest new members...

hiddlydiddly from Australia
gugukaja from Jakarta
Megan from Sunshine Coast
20/Oct/19 4:41 AM
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20/Oct/19 4:42 AM
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Morning all,Kate must have been excited about the power being connected to the new house.
Thanks for the giggles today, Mr Cee.
20/Oct/19 4:54 AM
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Kate.Powerful photo today!
20/Oct/19 5:24 AM
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1:35. Good morning everyone.
20/Oct/19 6:07 AM
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A woman went to the doctor complaining of insomnia.
The doctor gave her a thorough examination, found absolutely nothing physically wrong with her, and then told her, 'Listen, if you ever expect to cure your insomnia, you just have to stop taking your troubles to bed with you.'
'I know,' said the woman, 'but I can't. My husband refuses to sleep alone…

20/Oct/19 6:07 AM
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This from a radio program, a true report of a happening in Michigan:

A guy buys a brand new Jeep Grand Cherokee for $30,000 and has $400+ monthly payments. He and a friend go duck hunting and of course all the lakes are frozen. These two guys go to the lake with the guns, the dog, the beer More...
20/Oct/19 6:10 AM
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In the beginning was the plan.
And then came the assumptions, and the assumptions were without form. And the plan was completely without substance.

And the darkness was upon the face of the workers. And they spoke amongst themselves, saying: “it is a crock of sh it, More...
20/Oct/19 6:23 AM
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...and the setting sun is radiating a beautiful brilliant red sky; have a good day everyone & it looks like our tomorrow will also be lovely!
20/Oct/19 9:28 AM
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Today's commentary was also eclectic like that dangerously eclectic power pole!
20/Oct/19 9:29 AM
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Good ones DoA,
20/Oct/19 9:54 AM
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Not a fan of Ft Worth.Last time I was there the roads had potholes that would swallow a Chevy.I was visiting a friend and was warned to go back and and go around the freeway but do we men take directions??? Noooo we know better with the aid of Mr Google.
20/Oct/19 10:00 AM
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Saturday 19th October.
Arachnid – House painter extraordinaire. Off to the golf club to meet up with a couple of his WA roo mates. He got the idea when his missus made him hop to it!
Chris – Between marathons.
Aileen – Sunday lunch in Florida. More...
20/Oct/19 12:08 PM
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1:58 Good morning all.
20/Oct/19 12:42 PM
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Hal say ' HI' to my daughter while you are in Ft Worth.
20/Oct/19 1:19 PM
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I was also at a yard sale today, the charity was me. This is War Eagle weekend, There are so many different craft showes it is hard to go to all in one weekend.
20/Oct/19 1:26 PM
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It's my bedtime, have been up since 5 and I don't do early.
20/Oct/19 1:27 PM
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Hal is 'on the road again' so there might be a change for some other to turn the page or take first post of the day or even first post of the day. It is no good me trying because all those things happen while I'm in bed, so I'll look forward to seeing who gets them, if anyone.
20/Oct/19 6:37 PM
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Tom no need to apologise to Mr Cee, even if you meant it!! It is part of the Australian psyche to have a laugh at someone - it is called 'taking the urine' and happens all the time. Besides I am sure Mr Cee can take a joke
20/Oct/19 7:03 PM
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However Tom, addressing the Phantom as Ms/Mr is serious. Are you implying IT is confused?
20/Oct/19 7:05 PM
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A mention in all 3 posts Tom. I have sent you a PM
20/Oct/19 7:06 PM
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And another for BOTP
20/Oct/19 7:07 PM
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