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Submitted by: Gath

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It was very hot yesterday. 32*C
03/Jan/15 6:06 AM
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ENTERTAINING IN YOUR HOME:
1. A centerpiece for the table should never be anything prepared by a taxidermist.
2. Do not allow the dog to eat at the table, no matter how good his manners are.
03/Jan/15 6:06 AM
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Who did that while I was thinking?
03/Jan/15 6:06 AM
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PERSONAL HYGIENE:
1. While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this is a job that should be done in private using one's OWN truck keys.
2. Even if you live alone, deodorant is not a waste of good money.
3. Use of proper toiletries can only delay bathing for a few days.
4. Dirt and grease More...
03/Jan/15 6:07 AM
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DATING (Outside the Family):
1. Always offer to bait your date's hook, especially on the first date.
2. Be assertive. Let her know you're interested: 'I've been wanting to go out with you since I read that stuff on the bathroom wall two years ago.'
3. Establish with her parents what time More...
03/Jan/15 6:07 AM
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THEATRE ETIQUETTE:
1. Crying babies should be taken to the lobby and picked up immediately after the movie has ended.
2. Refrain from talking to characters on the screen. Tests have proven they can't hear you.
03/Jan/15 6:07 AM
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WEDDINGS:
1. Livestock is usually a poor choice for a wedding gift.
2. Kissing the bride for more than 5 seconds may get you shot.
3. For the groom, at least, rent a tux. A leisure suit with a cummerbund and a clean bowling shirt can create a tacky appearance.
4. Though uncomfortable, say 'yes' to socks and shoes for this special occasion.
03/Jan/15 6:08 AM
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DRIVING ETIQUETTE:
1. Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles, even if the gun is loaded and the deer is in sight.
2. When approaching a four-way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires does not always have the right of way.
3. Never tow another car using panty hose and duct More...
03/Jan/15 6:08 AM
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DorA's very chatty this morning.
03/Jan/15 6:09 AM
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I think I'll go and download some games.
03/Jan/15 6:10 AM
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Two questions to ponder -

Who did what?

What in the world was CP thinking???
03/Jan/15 6:11 AM
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Morning all,thought that hat might have had something to do will football.
03/Jan/15 6:18 AM
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Sue,I think that is a great plan...visit Australia on the way home.
03/Jan/15 6:21 AM
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Everybody.

I guess Silvergal and I will just need to root for opposite teams in the College Football Championship game on Jan. 11. I'm obviously rooting for the Buckeyes, like I always do! GO BUCKS! BEAT THE DUCKS!
03/Jan/15 6:35 AM
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Time to get this year hopping along.
03/Jan/15 6:35 AM
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She answered the question - before I even asked. ESP?
03/Jan/15 6:58 AM
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Don't Arkansas fans have ANY shame???
03/Jan/15 6:59 AM
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1.20
03/Jan/15 7:00 AM
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Oh, my stars!
Just learned Man had planned to pick up two cases or is going to pick up two more cases or is going to get another case to have two cases, of tea lights.
Granted, this is a great price on tea lights, but my gosh, what does one doe with so many tea lights?
03/Jan/15 7:04 AM
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1:36. Good morning everyone.
03/Jan/15 7:26 AM
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Burn 'em, Karen - Burn 'em.
03/Jan/15 7:26 AM
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Just discovered that my 'no freeze' farm hydrant did. Perhaps the water table is too high for it to properly drain. Hopefully, I won't have to dig it up and replace it.
03/Jan/15 7:30 AM
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GOODBYE, ELLY MAY
'Hillbillies' Donna Douglas reportedly dead at 81. RIP.
03/Jan/15 7:45 AM
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Hate to have to sneeze with a mouthful of WHAT, DoA??
03/Jan/15 7:45 AM
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Aaa-Hmmm, Judy, A gentle-person never tells......................................................................
03/Jan/15 8:16 AM
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Besides, If Karen & Hubby can go ''Up and down. Up and down'' for 10 minutes, I guess I can sneeze, once, with a mouthful.
03/Jan/15 8:22 AM
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Spent about 4.5 hours at the doctor's office today. Have had a bad cough for the last 3-4 days and decided I'd better get it checked out. The time was as follows:
1. Checking in and paper work - 20 minutes.
2. Preliminary time with nurse (weigh in, BP, etc. - 15 minutes.
3. Chest X-ray - More...
03/Jan/15 2:56 PM
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I have to admit that the waiting room was packed when I got there, and I got to read the latest issue of Time magazine, cover to cover. So, I guess I can't complain too much.
03/Jan/15 3:02 PM
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DOA, I got to tell ya man, that I would follow all of your SOUTHERN RULES FOR PERFECT LIVING except for one: Barbara insists that we change the sheets every week. Go figure.
03/Jan/15 3:30 PM
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Oh, and as for the gas can thing, I go with her. She carries the gas can and I carry the beer.
03/Jan/15 3:55 PM
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Wow, it's almost midnight. Some of the drugs the doctor told me to take seem to have had a strange effect. I'm wide awake.
03/Jan/15 4:00 PM
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Take away her washing machine and give her a tub and washboard. Throw in a clothes line for good measure, and see what she says. (Why isn't there a devilish smilie when I need one.)
03/Jan/15 4:00 PM
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Did you know that codeine causes constipation in some people?
03/Jan/15 4:02 PM
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Can't justify my last post. It is just what popped into my head. Yeah, I know, Now everyone knows - I lost all my 'commons sense' somewhere along the way.
03/Jan/15 4:03 PM
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Yep, 'Oxi' does too.
03/Jan/15 4:03 PM
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Hey there, DOA. W'sup?
03/Jan/15 4:04 PM
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Wanna race for the page change?
03/Jan/15 4:05 PM
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Just 3 to go.
03/Jan/15 4:06 PM
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2.
03/Jan/15 4:06 PM
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BOPP
03/Jan/15 4:07 PM
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