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Submitted by: Gath

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Good Maen, all!
30/Dec/19 12:00 AM
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'Alright Mike Tyson, to win $100,000 you need to name a fashion accessory and a place in Australia.'
Mike Tyson:

'That's easy.

The answer is Perth!'
30/Dec/19 12:12 AM
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Soooooo good it snuck over the page from Yesterday.

30/Dec/19 12:16 AM
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1:58. You just can't keep a good lisping joke down, Mr Cee! Good Morning to you, to Wolf and to everyone yet to come!
30/Dec/19 1:10 AM
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Wolf, Mr Cee, Tom and all to follow!
30/Dec/19 1:41 AM
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I can't let Mr. Cee get away with that twice.....

What movie was based on the life of Othkar Thindler?

Shindler's Lisp

30/Dec/19 1:43 AM
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Early birds and all who follow!!
30/Dec/19 1:55 AM
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My favorite lisp joke ...

She asked the shopkeeper in the sweetest little lisp: ''Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?''

As the shopkeeper’s heart melted, he got down on his knees to her level and asked:''Do you want a widdle white wabbit or a thoft and fuwwy bwack More...
30/Dec/19 2:27 AM
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all. I can certainly understand why that's Judy's favorite.
30/Dec/19 3:32 AM
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Oh, Judy!
30/Dec/19 3:45 AM
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30/Dec/19 4:24 AM
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I weally thought those were funny!
30/Dec/19 5:04 AM
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I dedicate this post to Queen Anne
30/Dec/19 5:05 AM
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Not pretty, but useful.
30/Dec/19 6:16 AM
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Morning all !
Judy's joke weally made me laugh.😂😂
30/Dec/19 6:20 AM
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1:43. Good morning everyone.
30/Dec/19 8:07 AM
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While on lisp jokes....
A young girl at the doctors.
Stethescope in place he says to her, 'Big breaths.'
She replies, 'Yeth, and I'm only thixtheen!'
30/Dec/19 10:45 AM
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Oops! Time to change the avatar again.
30/Dec/19 10:46 AM
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Gettin' closer, I'll wait for Keith to show up.
30/Dec/19 10:47 AM
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Bad fire news for our Eastern States aussies. Please stay safe, get out when told so that you can return to the site shortly.
For Peter, same conditions as for the last time so you and your compatriots stay safe. don't be a statistic
30/Dec/19 11:25 AM
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Still time to get your quiz answers in whilst we wait for Keith to fulfil his 22
30/Dec/19 11:25 AM
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30/Dec/19 11:29 AM
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A six foot beetle knocked on my door today. when I opened it hit me in the face and called me an ugly bugger.

Apparently there's a nasty bug going around
30/Dec/19 11:54 AM
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“I finally snapped,” the man said. “Last night while I was going over the bills, I discovered how much money my wife squanders and I hit the roof.”

“What did you do?” asked his friend.

“I stormed into the bedroom and gave her a lecture on economy and thrift.”

“Did it help?”

“I’ll say. Tomorrow we’re selling my boat and sailing equipment.”
30/Dec/19 1:41 PM
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A pair of a novice sailors’, a Westralian and a Queenslander's best mate died and, in his will, specified that he wanted them to bury him at sea.

So, the pair set out from shore in a rowboat with the body. They had rowed out a little way when one got out of the boat and stood knee deep in More...
30/Dec/19 1:48 PM
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A magician was working on a cruise ship in the Caribbean.

The audience would be different each week, so the magician allowed himself to do the same tricks over and over again.

There was only one problem: The captain’s parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the More...
30/Dec/19 1:50 PM
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One day a man decided to retire...

He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and
proceeded to have the time of his life, that is, until the ship sank.

He soon found himself on an island with no other
people, no supplies, nothing, only bananas and coconuts.

After about More...
30/Dec/19 3:23 PM
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'Tell me,' she begins suggestively, slithering
closer to him, 'We've both been out here for many
months. You must have been lonely. When was the last time you had a really good ride?'

She stares into his eyes.
He can't believe what he's hearing.
30/Dec/19 3:24 PM
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Can I post now, Mr Cee or is there more!
30/Dec/19 4:13 PM
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Today's jokes are good. BUT Judy's is a cracker - right on for my sense of humour. I know I'm sick
30/Dec/19 6:56 PM
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Wife texts husband at work on a cold winter morning 'The Windows'. Husband texts back 'Pour some tepid water over it'
A little later wife texts back 'Computer totally screwed now'
30/Dec/19 7:00 PM
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The Catholic Church has agreed to a new system of selecting the Pope.

Tune in next week for Simon Cowell's 'The Vatican's got Talent'
30/Dec/19 7:03 PM
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It is now 1605 here, the sun is over the Yardarm and I am dry from chasing grandchildren.
Feel free to select your poison, I will pay but haven't got the energy to get up and serve you
30/Dec/19 7:04 PM
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Slack, just slack, Arachnid.
30/Dec/19 7:39 PM
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Sorry Peter. Gulpers for you next time
30/Dec/19 8:13 PM
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Deadset gotta get our own drink. Sigh
30/Dec/19 8:30 PM
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Sorry too Mr Cee. I give you a gulpers too which will be a treat you may never have experienced before. And it would be a good treat despite your two piece beach bathing pose!!
30/Dec/19 10:02 PM
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