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Submitted by: Gath

Indicate which comments you would like to be able to see


402
11/Jun/10 11:29 AM
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403
11/Jun/10 11:29 AM
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I guess I scared everybody off.
11/Jun/10 11:29 AM
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You people better not be out there having lives ... that's not allowed.
11/Jun/10 11:29 AM
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I'm getting tired.
11/Jun/10 11:30 AM
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Think I'll take a break.
11/Jun/10 11:30 AM
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to you,
to you,
dear Lynne!!!
to you!
May your special day be wonderful with a and lots of !
11/Jun/10 11:34 AM
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Finally back from my shower and you've filled almost 2 pages - I wasn't gone that long!
11/Jun/10 11:37 AM
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Theresa - come back with more things to make us smile.
11/Jun/10 11:37 AM
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Okay Cyn, are you telling me I'm wordy??? BTW my hubby and I will be celebrating our 35th anniversary next month.
11/Jun/10 11:38 AM
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By the way Theresa - Andre is a 'she'. Well, she is a lady.
11/Jun/10 11:38 AM
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Hi Shosho!
11/Jun/10 11:38 AM
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Happy Birthday, Lynne.
11/Jun/10 11:38 AM
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A few more posts then back to the ironing.
11/Jun/10 11:39 AM
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I will now be submitting some embarrassing medical examinations ... apparently true. Stay tuned.
11/Jun/10 11:39 AM
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1. A man comes into the ER and yells. ' My wife's going to have her baby in the cab.' I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed that there were several cabs. and I was in the wrong one.
Submitted by Dr. Mark MacDonald,
San Francisco

11/Jun/10 11:40 AM
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Theresa - we're only up to 22 yrs. But, just between you and me, I was married before. Just so you don't wonder how I have children fast approaching 40. (No, that can't be possible!)
11/Jun/10 11:40 AM
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2. At the beginning of my shift I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient's anterior chest wall.

'Big breaths,'. . . I instructed. 'Yes, they used to be,'. . .replied the patient.
Submitted by Dr. Richard Byrnes,
Seattle , WA

11/Jun/10 11:41 AM
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3. One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. Not more than five minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he had died of a 'massive internal f*rt.'
Submitted by Dr. Susan Steinberg
11/Jun/10 11:42 AM
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4. During a patient's two week follow-up appointment with his cardiologist, he informed me, his doctor, that he was having trouble with one of his medications. ' Which one ?' I asked. 'The patch... The Nurse told me to put on a new one every six hours and now I'm running out of places to put it More...
11/Jun/10 11:42 AM
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5. While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, 'How long have you been bedridden?' After a look of complete confusion she answered . . ' Why, not for about twenty years - when my husband was alive..'
Submitted by Dr. Steven Swanson-
Corvallis , OR
11/Jun/10 11:43 AM
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No 3 is hilarious! Hubby has just walked off guffawing.
11/Jun/10 11:43 AM
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6. I was performing rounds at the hospital one morning and while checking up on a man I asked, ' So how's your breakfast this morning?' ' It's very good except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't seem to get used to the taste.' Bob replied. I then asked to see the jelly and Bob produced a foil packet labeled 'KY Jelly.'
Submitted by Dr. Leonard Kransdorf,
Detroit
11/Jun/10 11:43 AM
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7. A nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room when a young woman with purple hair styled into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting a variety of tattoos, and wearing strange clothing, entered. It was quickly determined that the patient had acute appendicitis, so she was scheduled for immediate More...
11/Jun/10 11:45 AM
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Yechhh for the Kentucky Jelly!
11/Jun/10 11:45 AM
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AND FINALLY!! ! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

8. As a new, young MD doing his residency in OB, I was quite embarrassed when performing female pelvic exams. To cover my embarrassment, I had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly. The middle-aged lady upon whom I was performing More...
11/Jun/10 11:46 AM
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I hope I'm not offending anyone by these jokes ... as I said, my sister is as twisted as I am.
11/Jun/10 11:46 AM
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Subject: Your Real Age....

Answer a few questions about your health and condition, and this will give you your virtual age and your life expectancy. One of the BETTER ones. (Copy and paste the link below to your browser:)

http://www.peterrussell.com/Odds/VirtualAge.php
11/Jun/10 11:48 AM
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I agree -- number 3 wast great -- I'm LOL
11/Jun/10 11:48 AM
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Theresa - I'm not offended and my hubby wants a copy - do you have my email addy??
11/Jun/10 11:48 AM
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WHERE WOULD YOU BE:


IF - YOU HAD ALL THE MONEY YOUR HEART DESIRES?


IF - YOU HAD NO WORRIES?


IF - YOU CAME HOME AND THE FINEST MEAL WAS AWAITING YOU


IF - YOUR BATH WATER HAD BEEN RUN?


IF - YOU HAD THE PERFECT KIDS OR PETS?


IF - More...
11/Jun/10 11:48 AM
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Cyn, is it the one that's shown on your "info" on FB?
11/Jun/10 11:50 AM
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I have read most of them before Theresa, but enjoyed reading them again. Better than just seeing numbers.
11/Jun/10 11:51 AM
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I'm rich!



Silver
in the Hair

Gold
in the Teeth

Stones
in the Kidneys

Sugar
in the Blood.

Lead
in the A*s




Iron
in the Arteries

And
an inexhaustible supply of Natural Gas.



I never thought I'd accumulate such wealth.




11/Jun/10 11:52 AM
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I'm off to see how old I am
11/Jun/10 11:52 AM
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Got a few minutes to spare.
11/Jun/10 11:53 AM
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Back to my DVD and the ironing.
11/Jun/10 11:53 AM
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Or maybe a few more posts would turn the page.
11/Jun/10 11:53 AM
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Looking forward to a nice dinner tonight. Going to my sisters.
11/Jun/10 11:54 AM
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She is cooking a duck
11/Jun/10 11:54 AM
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