Sudokuaholics Anonymous 11

HARPO MARX FAMILY RULES

1. Life has been created for you to enjoy, but you won't enjoy it unless you pay for it with some good, hard work. This is one price that will never be marked down.

2. You can work at whatever you want as long as you do it as well as you can and clean up afterwards and are at the table at mealtime and in bed at bedtime.

3. Respect what the others do. Respect Dad's harp, Mom's paints, Billy's piano, Alex's set of tools, Jimmy's designs and Minnie's menagerie.

4. If anything makes you sore, come out with it. Maybe the rest of us are itching for a fight, too.

5. If anything strikes you as funny, out with that, too. Let's all the rest of us have a laugh.

6. If you have an impulse to do something that you're not sure is right, go ahead and do it. Take a chance. Chances are, if you don't you'll regret it - unless you break the rules about mealtime and bedtime, in which case you'll sure as h*ll regret it.

7. If it's a question of whether to do what's fun or what is supposed to be good for you, and nobody is hurt whichever you do, always do what's fun.

8. If things get to much for you and you feel the whole world's against you, go stand on your head. If you can think of anything crazier to do, do it.

9. Don't worry about what other people think. The only person in the world important enough to conform to is yourself.

10. Anybody who mistreats a pet or breaks a pool cue is docked a month's pay.

Harpo's kids all grew up happy and well adjusted. I got to know his son Bill a little, and he's an incredibly nice person.

Good topp Heidi. Hope the epidural lasts a long time. You have done well to last this long between.
CynB - thinking of you both today. Best wishes.

Message from Cyn

Just out of surgery, tumour was the size of a tennis ball and the incision had to be bigger. He’s still in recovery so we’re waiting to see him. Otherwise the doc said it went well.

It’s a few days until biopsy results will be available

I’m so relieved. I kept reliving what happened to Don but with Col

So did I Suzy, so did I!! I would never assume that surgery is straightforward and nothing to worry about. Anything can, and does happen.
Had a huge 12 hour day waiting around the hospital. I was so thankful to have the 3 grandies with me. I kept saying that this was taking so long and for them to go home. They wouldn't!!
I'm off to bed now.

Good news so far, dear Cyn. Let's now hope that the tumor was completely contained and nothing spread. And that Col has an uneventful recovery.

Sorry I've remained in lurkdom so long. Have still been thinking of everyone.

Glad Col's op has gone well, Cyn, and hope the good news continues.

A happy little item from a couple of days ago:

https://www.msn.com/en-au/news/australia/bring-your-alpaca-to-bunnings-adorable-farm-animal-is-s potted-walking-through-the-aisles-of-the-popular-hardware-store/ar-AADF6dn?ocid=spartandhp

Neat story, saltie. Thanks for the link. I did have to remove the space that appeared (is-s potted-)

Cute story. That's a young alpaca, under 6 months old. Thanks for sharing it, saltie.

Okay, so we have had 2 pieces of news - NOT sharing on FB yet:
Good news - scan of upper body showed no hot spots.
Not so good - it looks like he's going to need chemo.
I am only going by what Col tells me, the Doc comes to see him so early in the morning, 7am or so, that I have not been there. I've asked him to organise with the doctor a time that I can see him or be there just so I can ask the questions I need answers to.
It is Col's birthday tomorrow so we have chosen not to share this with the family yet. We'll have a happy day visiting him at different stages tomorrow and hopefully know more by the time we do tell them.
I know this is not necessarily a death sentence but I am back to panic mode even though I knew the odds were high that this could happen.
If you know any good news stories of successful chemo, this is the time to tell me. I can only think of 2 of my cousins who were in similar situations to Col having chemo, then more troubles, and eventually dying within a few years.
I'll be leaving soon to collect Emily and Chloe and go up there for the afternoon so I'll look in here tonight.

Hello Saltie, nice to see you posting again.
Hello to everyone else, have a nice day and I hope all is well with you.

CynB - chemo is a way of making sure there are no cells that have 'escaped' - it certainly makes you tired and has some unpleasant side-effects but this is good news. I would really worry if there was no preventative treatment.

My mother-in-law had her cancer detected at an early stage. The doctors operated quickly, believed they got it all, but decided to do chemo in case. It was a smart move. Her cancer never returned. I'm glad they're doing that with Col. It greatly inproves his chances of staying free of cancer for a much longer time.

The cases that I've heard of where chemo has not been successful have all been when the person didn't go see a doctor for the first time until the cancer had reached fourth stage. I know chemo is nasty, but it's a life saver when used early. I really hope Col's was caught early enough. From what you've described, it sounds like it was.

Cyn,I have a friend who had chemo for cancer when I was still living in the US. She’s still around more than 20 years later.

Thanks everyone, I had it clarified a bit tonight. It appears that 5 minutes after I left this evening an oncologist came to talk to Col about the chemo and that the reason for it was merely a precaution to ensure that no cancer cells survived. Col tried to tell me but couldn't make it clear. Fortunately Maddy and her father, my ex son-in-law were there, so I rang them and they explained what the oncologist said. Maddy is a quick thinker, the woman said she would come back maybe tomorrow and Maddy said, yes, please do, my grandmother will want to know all this. So the woman promised she would.
Chemo will be every 2 weeks for 6 months.

Six months is a good trade for getting years more with his loved ones. And he will. I have a good feeling about this.

I hope Julie isn't overdoing it to the point where she isn't getting enough sleep.

Hi, Everyone! What a great TOPP, Heidi! How fun that you know Bill Marx! I hope your epidural was a good one!

Thanks for your concern, Heidi. We are back at home after the music camp. Hubby and I both found time for a quick nap one afternoon while we were there. Other days he was able to find time for a nap or at least rest while I 'studied' orchestra or cello choir music or did some quiet muted practice on the cello. This was during the afternoon recital, which I would have liked to and should have attended. Instead, I thought it was more important for hubby to rest and me to get some quiet time to practice. Mornings were rushed with an 8:30 to 9:25 class in one building, followed by a 9:30 to 10:25 class in another building, followed by a 10:30 to 11:25 class back in the first building. I tried not to get stressed about getting to classes late, and spoke to the instructors to let them know what was happening. Unfortunately, I completely missed the first of 2 of those classes, as my schedule was incorrect for one class, and there was no room or chair when I got to another class late. (MANY observers in that class). After the first 3 classes, we ate lunch before the scheduled daily afternoon recital. My afternoon classes were scheduled at 2:30, 3:30, and 4:30 and were luckily in the same building. We went to 3 of the evening recitals, but skipped Wednesday's and Thursday's. Thirty-five years ago when we took our children to this music camp, they had fewer classes, and we attended every recital. But we're older now.

Cyn, I have been thinking about you and Col! From what I have read here, results seem to be quite positive. It sounds like the doctor feels they were able to get all of the tumor and recovery from the surgery is likely to go well. Although chemo is no walk in the park, it seems as if many or most doctors opt for some chemo to be sure there are no hidden cells lurking to cause further problems in the future. Cyn, you have some pretty special grandchildren to stay with you during the long day of waiting!

Heidi, I hope your day lilies, hollyhocks, and hibiscus are all doing well!

Hi, saltie! So glad you could visit, and enjoyed the article you shared about the alpaca at the Bunnings store. I hope you're well!

Cyn, I hope Col had a nice birthday with visits from all of you! I hope that's enough cake to go around!

I also hope you have had an opportunity to talk with and ask questions with the surgeon and/or the oncologist. It can be very reassuring to have the specialist explain what was found, the plan of action, and answer any questions!

Midge, Heidi, saltie and others, thanks for sharing the stories of those you know who have received chemo treatments. Fortunately, friends and relatives I know have also had ultimately good results after chemo. I don't recall anyone who didn't have some chemo prescribed after their surgery. From all you've told us about Col, I think he has the strength and determination he needs to get through this. Sending positive thoughts and healing energy to both of you!

I'm thinking of all of our fellow Sudokuaholics. Sending lots of healing energy, prayers, warm and positive thoughts, and {{{{{HUGS}}}}} for Everyone!

I don't know Bill Marx well, I have chatted with him online a few times, after I bought a book (autographed, of course) from him. I would love to know him a LOT better.

I've started letting the alpacas in the yard with the dogs. Great grazing on the lawn. They love it! And they're leaving all my flowers alone like the good girls they are.

Gosh, it's been quiet around here in the last few days.
Heidi, that paints a nice picture of the Alpacas grazing on the lawn with the dogs - and the flowers.
Col came out of hospital on Monday. He is improving daily and sleeping well.
Giving up smoking is proving a problem. He knows he has to, he dodged a bullet that the cancer didn't go to his lungs, and he knows his grandchildren will get upset and worried should he keep going. He has had one each day since he's been out (I have the packet he left and have it hidden) and has managed on that. We made an appointment with his GP for tomorrow to discuss solutions with him.
Making the decision is easy and obvious. Doing it is sooo much harder. I am 5 years free of it and am thankful every day that I was able to do it and stick to it.

Col will find it a lot harder to quit smoking if he can have a cigarette each day. I swear by going cold turkey. Just quit. Don't have another one. Substitute something like a soothing cup of tea every time he feels the craving. Tea won't upset his metabolism and cause him to gain weight when he quits. I know whereof I speak.

Heidi, I love the picture in my mind of the alpacas and dogs sharing the lawn and leaving the flowers alone! I hope the new ones are all doing well!

Cyn, I have faith in Col that he will be able to give up smoking. Heidi may be right that cold turkey works.

Cold turkey was how my Dad quit. He didn't say anything to my Mom or any of us kids; he just quit smoking. We suddenly realized that there were no cigarette butts in the ashtray and no one had washed in for several days.

If Col has a particular time of day or activity that he associates with smoking, maybe he or you or the grandies can think of something to substitute at that time or during that activity to keep his hands and mind busy. Maybe a phone call or game? We're confident that Col can successfully quit!

I'm sending lots of , healing energy, positive thoughts, prayers, and {{{{{HUGS}}}}} for Everyone!

Advice from someone who has given up smoking many times - the last time hopefully successful. (about 5 yrs but would still love a cigarette some times) Substitute small strips of carrots, celery etc., put butts in a small bottle of water so they become so disgusting and dank you will never want them again. Good luck. If he can make it through 3 days without, he will be successful.

Count me as a 'used to be' smoker. 39 years ago I quit cold turkey. Now days when I have to go to town to go shopping, the smell of smoke as I cross parking lots, is almost nauseating. I have friends that I seldom go to see because the second hand smoke makes me think twice about visiting.

Quitting isn’t easy. Did you see my gateway drug post on TOS. For people who have the most trouble quitting I think that post is especially relevant. The reasons I smoked never went away. I’d still be smoking now if I wasn’t worried about leaving my daughter looking after a vegetable.

No, quitting isn't easy. But why make it harder by stringing it out and giving in to temptation once a day? You have to WANT to quit, then DO IT. I smoked for 28 years, almost 3 packs a day. Once I made up my mind to quit, I quit. Never had another cigarette. The worst of the cravings subsided after 5 days. A person just has to take it minute by minute until the nicotine is out of the system and the urge to have a cigarette doesn't rule your mind or life. It can be done. Cutting back does NOT remove the nicotine from your body. It just makes quitting harder. It allows you to make excuses and exceptions.

Quitting is different for Everybody! In my case it was a spur of the moment New Years resolution. I went to bed, early on New Years eve. My last waking thought was 'I don't have a resolution'. 'Maybe I'll quit smoking'. Haven't had one since. I, over a period of time, gave away more than three cartons, including the 'emergency packs' in the car glove box and the desk, at work...

After quitting, when ever I went clubbing or to a party where people were smoking, I'd wake in the morning and when I picked up the clothes I wore the night before, the smoke smell that permeated them nearly made me gag.

The last cartons I bought cost less than half of what a pack costs now. With the price of cigarettes, now days, I, sometimes wonder what folks might do with an 'extra' 300 dollars, plus, a month, if they were to quit.

5.10am here and I've just put Col in an ambulance. Back to hospital he goes. He was very restless before he went to bed and kept getting up and then going back. He eventually settled and so did I. He woke me about 3.45am and begged me to call the ambulance he was in such pain. So I did. Half and hour later they were here, and they've taken him back to hospital. His stitches are fine, the pain is inside, I think he may have ruptured something but he's been so careful. I'm waiting to hear from him. I'd be useless there at present. I have to wake Karin up to get her to move her car from behind mine - and I have Emily here. But she can stay here when I go to the hospital, she has food, wifi and TV. She'll be fine.

OMG Cyn!!!! How scary. At least he's where he needs to be. I know there's nothing you can do to help him right now, but YOU'LL feel better being at his side. Please keep us up to date on Col's condition. We care.

Thanks Heidi.
I just heard from him by text. They are admitting him and his surgeon is coming to see him. I'll wait until he lets me know where he is and I'll go to the hospital. I suspect he may have a blockage and whatever it is, I'm up for more days at the hospital.
Back when I have more news.

How far away is the hospital? I know you've told us, but I forgot.
Wear comfortable clothes, bring books, and bring your favorite comfort foods. One thing you and Col might enjoy are audiobooks. You can both listen to them, hold hands, close your eyes and relax. Most libraries have a large assortment.

Bummer - hope it is good news after this setback. Wishing Col the best.