Sudokuaholics Anonymous 10

Nola - I hope Judy is having a good day when you get there. Sonny sounds like a cute puppy - but aren't they all?
Heidi - aaarrgghh! I can understand your frustration with IH. I wish Maxine all the best, I hope she does eventually manage to change her life around and learn that she is a worthwhile person.
Tami - glad you got some time to read in peace, it's not always easy with the demands of a family.
Love and hugs to all!

(Oops, sorry - over the page)

Why fit in when you were born to stand out? Dr Seuss

I'm having a day full of memories today. When Karin was in High School she was part of a group of 6 (giggly) girls. They often congregated at our house - mainly because, to begin with, we lived over the road from the local shopping centre. And as they got older and went clubbing, they'd all come in at 3am and sleep on our floor or wherever until morning.
Over the years I watched these girls grow up and they've all kept in touch and got together whenever possible. The youngest of them is 40 today and I'm left realising that those 25 odd years went so fast!
Only 4 of them married and only 3 had kids, one is divorced now and one finally separated from an abusive husband recently. One has lived in Europe for the last 10 years. One is now a grandmother. And one, this youngest one (my favourite) is gay. We all knew this for a long time before she told us. She burst into tears when we said we knew and it made no difference to us. We suffered with her through her second bout of Leukemia at 19, we held our breath for days waiting to hear if she would survive a post-op crisis. Now she is happy and as healthy as is possible and settled with a partner who we all love.
This is why I love Christmas Eve, it's when we all get together to laugh and reminisce and catch up - it's been a tradition since they were in High School! I love being their other mother.

CynB... They sound like a wonderful group of girls/women. Karin sure knew how to pick great friends.

I LOVE that quote from Dr Seuss!!!!!

Heidi, the girl who has just separated from her husband was a bit like Maxine, although she had a happy upbringing, her brother committed suicide - he was bipolar after years of drug use. This was in the early years of her relationship with the husband. They now have 2 children. He has always put her down, complained about her weight problems - I'd say she became chubby rather than obese. He was not violent but was always verbally and emotionally abusive to her. She's had low self-esteem issues for years and always put it down to not having dealt properly with her brother's suicide. Recently she started seeing a psychologist and through that counselling finally realised that she has dealt with what happened to her bro, that she was powerless to stop him doing what he did, but mainly that her self-esteem issues were down to the husband, that he had been dragging her down all these years. She has worked their entire marriage, only taking a few months off to have the kids. He has never held a job for long.
She got the courage recently to tell him that it was over, he accepted it okay, the jerk probably thinks he can do better (haha), and is happier now that she has been in 20 years. That's how long it took!!
I hope Maxine breaks free sooner!

Hi everyone. :)
Hope you're happy. It's a beautiful day in Melbourne. :)

Thanks for the story, CynB. It's really hard for anyone with low-to-no self esteem to get the courage to break free. Maxine doesn't think she can make any good decisions, is afraid to be alone because she's so insecure, and feels hopeless. This just breaks my heart because she's such a sweet, lovely young lady with a lot of potential. I also feel guilty for not interfering more with the way her mother treated her when she was growing up. I tried to talk to her mother about what she was doing to her daughter, repeatedly, but never really lost my temper with her like I should have. I also considered contacting the authorities several times, but didn't. So I have guilt feelings.

We have made progress! IH just sold his POS Belarus tractor. They're hauling it off in the morning. That thing has been an eyesore near the road here for years, and hasn't run in 5 years. Of course, he's too tight to share the money with me even though I paid for the replacement.

Hi, Everyone! Another long & busy day! I have one last day to try to get the house ready. I'm not sure if I'll make it, as I have a cello lesson Tuesday and haven't had as much time to practice as I would like. Well, I can only do so much!

Thinking of Rolanda & Peter with their preparations for the move. Good luck!

Nola, thinking of you and Judy and hoping she is comfortable!

Heidi, you are doing what can be done for Maxine, and that's all you can do! Give her the opportunities and encouragement and support and hope she can take it from there! So sorry to hear about IH and the calf-sorting fiasco!

It's nearly 1 a.m., so I need to call it a night. Sending lots of positive thoughts, prayers, healing vibes and {{{{{ H U G S }}}}} for everyone!

Good Night!

Heidi, yelling wouldn't have done anything, just blocked your access to Maxine, but I know what you mean about guilt. When I was around 12 I was billeted with a family and the father touched me inappropriately. I told the girls who were billeted in the same house and they laughed and made out it was nothing. To this day I wonder what his daughters (my age) were going through and wish that I had told an adult! I'm also very grateful that so many of us were in the same house or who knows what might have happened! Maybe when you show Maxine that you respect her decisions (which you have shown us you will) she will learn to respect herself.

Tami, glad you got some quiet time. We love our kids, but! A couple of times this weekend I sat out the back with a book hoping for some peace, but it wasn't to be!! Someone always has something urgent to talk to me about when I sit out there...

I had a thought about Maxine. The trigger for her leaving for good might be him treating the child the way he treats her!!

Nola, I hope your visit with Judy was good. I love lightning, it is beautiful, but watched from shelter, not walking through it! Judy may have been disappointed not to see you, but it was still the right decision.

George Takai meme: America. Where one day after giving thanks for what we have, we trample each other to buy what we don't.

Cyn, what wonderful memories! How old was the youngest before she 'risked' telling you her 'secret'? It must have been amazing for her to have that acceptance from you... And what a tough time she had with 2 bouts of leukemia... no wonder she was your favourite. Sad story about the one with the abusive husband, but a happy ending!

Julie, I can't wait until you feel comfortable enough to post a recording of you playing!

Daily anecdote: Finally had a class tell me they like me more than their regular teacher! I was starting to think this woman must walk on water the way the other classes have acted about having me...

Took cricket for junior sport. Most of them played at least some of the time so it was a success!

Alie has resolved to go on a diet until the formal on Wednesday - if she sees food then she has to eat it! And she is! Bottomless pit these last few days...

She dressed up in her dress yesterday and did her hair approximately the way she is going to on Wednesday - she is going to look beautiful!

Just lost a post, must have leant on the pad thingy and it just took me back to page 516!!

Suzy - she told us on Karin's Wedding Day, Karin was a few weeks off 25, so the girl, I'll just call her 'K' was 24 as well. She hadn't told her parents and we kept telling her to just do it. I knew these people, we all went through her illness, I knew they would be okay. Anyway, she put it off and put it off and then her father passed away suddenly. She was incredibly guilty and told her mother eventually. Her Mum, a lovely innocent country girl, said 'Are you sure it's not a phase??' (Yes, people must say that!! Lol) When assured it wasn't, her Mum accepted it and all is well.

Suzy.... What access to Maxine? She lived 1200 miles away! The only time I saw her was when I visited her mother. I was being constantly appalled by the way her mother told me she was treating her. The only time her mother put her on the phone with me was when she was a toddler / preschooler and only spoke and understood Russian.

Off to run to the bank. I need cash for my trip and cash for my friend Debby, who's gonna be pet and house sitting. IH decided to schedule a trip out of town this week, knowing I was gonna be gone. I think he was trying to make me cancel my trip, and got annoyed with me when I arranged for Debby to stay here while he was gone. Debby is still having a few legal problems after the nightmare her daughter caused a few years ago (Her daughter committed felonies, lied to officials implicating her mother, Debby was arrested and jailed, and fired from her great job because of it. I bailed her out of jail, pulled her youngest out of foster care, paid her legal fees for a good lawyer and helped her through the worst of it. ]{I got her off, but was unable to prove that she was completely innocent.} Among all of the many charges and fines, there was one bill she was sent where she was forced to pay for her son's foster care, and she forgot about it. She was just sent a summons to appear in court over it. I'm giving her the money to pay the fine, since she doesn't have it.

Heidi what a caring friend you are to Debby and Maxine. My niece lived with us for a while after trying suicide three times and her parents could no longer cope. You will succeed with Maxine as you have the patience and strength To just be there and guide her to decision making for herself. Low self esteem takes a long time to overcome. My niece is now living inDarwin, a mother and running her own fitness business. She is also bipolar and coping very well. We had to keep reinforcing to her that nobody has to be second best in life and that everyone deserved to be loved and respected for themselves. It was not easy. Cyn - my cousin has just recently passed away with melanomas. He was gay and a farmer. My uncle always said it was something he caught in the city! He didn't care about the cancer, just the fact his son was gay. What a shame he never knew what a greatperson his own son was!

Morning all,
Just a quick drop in before school and I'm on the little netbook so I will post short posts in case I lose one.

Heidi, the things you do for people! Sometimes that can backfire, I saw it with my mum. Some of the people she helped didn't want to feel inferior so they would somehow blame her for their problems. That didn't happen in Moulamein which is why we had her funeral there.

Midge, something he caught in the city?? If it wasn't so sad it would be funny. The sort of thing you'd see on a sitcom, what was that show? Kingswood Country? Somewhere like that. Thank goodness times are changing... It sounds like your cousin was a success in life in spite of his father. I hope he found happiness...

Cyn, a phase? Ditto what I said about catching it! I'm glad mum came around. Hubby said he used to get the funniest looks when he said 'we thought we'd let them decide', as if accepting he might have a gay child was strange!

Computer is going to restart to install updates so I'm off... love you all.... have a great day!

Safe trip, Heidi.

Been MIA ... miserable cold, achey, tummy problems, and on and on. Just very blah!

So many people here with problems. Hugs for everyone, whether you need them or not!

To add a bit of suspense to this week, we had an accident. One of the year old puppies had a silent heat and her dad bred her. She's really showing the pregnancy now. Since I don't know when she was in season, I don't know when the puppies are due. I'm hoping that she holds off until I return. I'm setting up the whelping box in the sunroom, and Debby is aware of the problem. I haven't told IH that there are surprise puppies due. He'd just throw a tantrum.

Oooh puppies, Heidi! Lovely, we'll need photos when they arrive!
Midge - I'm sorry about you cousin - the melanomas and the unaccepting Dad.
Theresa - sorry about the cold and feeling 'blah'. Hope you're feeling better soon.

Almost completely packed. I don't think I've forgotten anything. I hope. I'm not taking a carry-on bag so I can bring blintzes back if I can find any. I couldn't find any where I was in North Carolina a few weeks ago. I'm always hopeful.

CynB.... There are 6 possible colors these puppies can be... unfortunately, 25% of them can be double dilute white merles. Those are frequently born defective and are usually euthanized at birth. I had one years ago who wasn't defective and lived a long, happy life. With only 2 or 3 puppies expected, I'm crossing my fingers that I won't have to deal with a defective one (born without eyes altogether.).

Hi all. Just in for a few minutes. I am beginning to feel if it wasn't for bad luck, I would have no luck. My car overheated as I got to school today. Let it cool off until lunch time and then went out and filled it with water. Had extra water with me. Got it to the mechanic to discover that my radiator had a crack in it. $450 repair bill. Add that to the $250 for a water pump a few weeks ago and almost $300 for hubby's radiator. Mine cost more due to the amount of labor. They had to take the front of the car off in order to get to it. My engine is really goofy looking. Even a minor repair is a major hassle.

Heidi, if you can't find blintzes, let me know. I will figure out a way to pack and ship them to you. I am sure Fed-Ex or UPS can handle it and I can pack it in dry ice.

I know where I can find them, Tami, but it's a 4 hour drive each way. One day I'll make a safari to Jungle Jim's in Ohio.

Heidi, go to Publix when you are down here. The ones by me all carry them and the ones up where you are going to be should have them also.

Thanks, Tami. I'll see if I can find one.

I'll see you all on Sunday. I'm off to bed in a few minutes, and will be leaving at 7 am. I'm really excited. My friends say that they're gonna pamper me!!!

Bon voyage Heidi :)

Have a great time Heidi! Enjoy!! (I know you will)

Theresa, big hugs and feel better soon!!!

OMG Tami! It never rains but it pours out your way! Only a few months to hold off and it all had to happen now... big hugs and better luck vibes sent your way

Have a wonderful trip Heidi!

Daily anecdote: I had 3 classes today. I thought I was going to have a full day but the school had a motivational speaker in the other period. There are only 4 periods a day at this school, which means each one is really long and hard to fill with interesting stuff. I've taken to spending the first 10 minutes of so quizzing the kids on the stuff I've taught them before, it helps get them focused and hopefully remembering some of the stuff I've taught them.

Year 8 are mostly good now. I just have 2 pairs of boys I will have to make sure don't sit together next time I have them and all will be hunky dory.

Year 10 are difficult. We are being told they must be given meaningful work and engaged in real lessons. They think differently. They have done their exams, next year they are seniors and they feel they are finished for the year. I'm supposed to be covering evolution and genetics with them. They are not at all interested. Today I took them to the library and they played a game 'I want to live a million years'. You select creatures and they go through encounters with extreme weather and predators etc and the goal is to survive a million years by evolving. I told them the person to survive the longest would get a chocolate (I had mini snickers bars) They played that game and then some math games. I figure they were getting an idea of what evolution is all about and I can build on that next lesson. Hopefully I will come up with something interesting by then... They all survived a million years by the way, lucky I had enough chocolates! Not at first and not all the time, but they kept playing afterwards trying to get it again so I figure they were engaged.

Greetings o Everyone! D, SIL and 3 grandies arrive tomorrow morning. The house is almost done. (Phew!) I have a cello lesson in the afternoon. Middle grandie (age 4) is also taking cello lessons, & will come to my lesson and play for my teacher (who knows her teacher). The music school is the same place our Ds took lessons, so D plans to show the grandies around.

Sending {{{{{ H U G S }}}}}, healing vibes, positive thoughts and prayers for each of you and those you love!

Have a safe trip, Heidi!

Time for bed . . .

Groan, well that hurt. I've just put together 2 lessons for year 10 on evolutionary genetics. The problem was, I had to learn it first! I think I've told you that biology is not my strong point!

I also had to do pH of the skin for year 11! Another biology topic! Geology for year 9. I got lucky with year 8, I did that yesterday... They're doing electricity so not so bad.

Morning all. Coffee is ready, help yourself.

Suzy, we still have to get the power steering fixed on hubby's car. That will be $250. Mechanic told us to keep an eye on it, fill it up as necessary, but it does not have to be fixed, yet. Also, our garage door broke and cost us about $200 to fix. Since the garage door is 16 years old, I think it was about time.

Gekko all..... I'm in the Apple store at the Atlanta airport. Everything is going great so far. I'll try to check in later.

Hi folks..
Just lost a post.
Will try to get back and recap later..
All is well.. just busy.
Singing on Tuesday nights, drumming on Wednesdays and a few public performances keep me juggling things. Diary seems to be always double booked.. after a big day out I seem to just need to hibernate... Learning to leave a rest day between activities... not that much resting seems to happen but it does mean I don't leave home.

We have three performances booked with Melbourne Sings. The Town Hall isn't booked out yet on the the 2nd December if any Melbournites want to attend. [I have a few t5ickets that I haven't sold]
It promises to be a wonderful concert. In fact I'm blown away by the talent of some of the people I sing with. Talk about inspire one..