Sudokuaholics Anonymous 9A

Oh Judy, I am very sorry to hear of this latest setback. You have done your best, that is all you can do.

Ah, I'm back! Thanks Gail - chocolate helps!

Phew thought we had lost you Judy.
Oh yes Chocolate always helps !!!!

Chocolate and friends! How would we survive without them?

Judy, in your position what I would be tempted to do would be to leave ALL care to your brother. He has obviously agreed to this. Let them all work out together what a seriously bad idea this was. Of course that was just a vent and I know I'd do what you are probably planning to do and check on them frequently....

Mwahahaaa! (That's insane laughter, in case anyone doesn't know - thought it went with the whole "I'm a teapot .... feed me chocolate!" tone of conversation ... )

It will be hard work - the caring, I know from having Mum home from Hospital, for a stay at Hotel Rolanda, on numerous occasions, whether I was happy to or not.
And if you are anything like me Judy, you would end up doing the caring, even though a Sibling put up their hand and said no worries I'll do it !!!

Hi Equa ... Equi ... eeee!!!
Problem is, my Dad is as stubborn as hell, and my Mum is suffering from dementia. Not a good mix.
I've eaten too much chocky, and now I feel a bit sick ...

Okay, since I can't say it to her because of the 'keep the door open' stuff, I thought I'd say it here. At least then I get to say it!!! (I'm not really here by the way, I have a tonne of ffuts to do)

If she calls and invites me for a coffee again... I'd love to see you if you really want to see me. On the other hand, if this is another 'do the right thing by the 'rents' thing, I'd really rather not. I've taken the knife out of my back and am healing nicely so there is no need, and they are uncomfortable and meaningless.

Judy, that is a scary combo and one that cannot be reasoned with! Does it now fall into the category MizT has... how did it go?... things that are your problem but you can't do anything about? No, probably not since you will probably get to do lots about it. Sigh. Want to scream together? I've heard it is almost as therapeutic as chocolate!

Rolanda, if they lived nearby, no problem - but they are 2 1/2 hours drive away -
I've heard that some people get excited about grandchildren - my parents moved away. Not that I'm bitter and twisted, much, but I didn't think that 30 years later we would still be doing that drive.

OMG - what a newsy page or so I have just read and a few of you need big hugs and chocolate.
Firstly Theresa - great big hugs coming to you, especially dealing with grandies and arthritis - I have it in my fingers and find that debilitating and frustrating enough. Pleased you're getting a bit of a break today with your SIL to help.

Judy - more big hugs and lots of chocolate and a glass or two of your fave tipple to you. It is true that the light at the end of the tunnel are just the lights of an oncoming train. And, yes, it seems that just when your kids seem to settle happily into adult life is when your parents become kids again. OMG!
Why doesn't anyone tell us this and if they do, why don't we listen!!!!???

The Train lights here in the West have been coming here for the last 18 months, and it looks like it will not get dimmer anytime soon, if anything brighter !!!

Now Miss Eggy Equi??? Suzy - Glad you got to have coffee with Ebob, whether it turned out how you wanted or not, I suppose that the door at least is open for communication as long as it's on her terms. At present it is, as someone said, rose-coloured glasses - but we all know how soon that can fade. Patience, Mum, patience! Blood is thicker that water!!

Sorry Rolanda, I should have included you in those hugs and treats, yes - you're facing that train as well. I'm well past that, but I'm at the other end watching the shell of what used to be my Mum deteriorate.......... ah, fudge!

Anybody else I missed who needed hugs have some now.
June - have a great trip.

Chocolate and now fudge Cyn??

That's my favourite flavour of fudge, Broni!!! lol

To everybody here.
My orchids are doing wonderfully. This one will be in bloom in the next couple of days! I have 9 in bloom, and an equal number getting ready to open soon. Then, the canaries are sitting on eggs again (I'm not holding my breath - this is their 7th nest, with no fertile eggs before) and the lovebirds should start brooding in the next day or 2. When IH's friend saw the sunroom last night, his jaw dropped, and he immediately phoned his wife to describe it.

I'm off to bed now.

Hello, Everyone! I'm VERY late (or is it very EARLY?) this morning? It's almost 1 a.m.

Hi, Heidi, CynB, Equanimous/Suzy, Victoria, Broni, Bean, Tami, Theresa, Gail, June, Rolanda, Judy, MizTricia,

Heidi, here's hoping that IH may one day learn to read and follow the rules for closing the gates!

CynB, so sorry to hear that your Mum is sleeping more during your visits! What a treat that you ran into your sister and her grandies while shopping and could share lunch together!

Equanimous, I'm so glad you and hubby were able to have an enjoyable lunch - and hope you can follow through on your goal while Ally is away.

Victoria, I'm glad things are getting caught up at work! I hope you get straightened out on the payment you're unsure about! (I can't imagine going home a couple of hours after having a baby, as your niece did! I had about 3 days in hospital with each child, thank goodness!

Broni, how are things going for you? Are you feeling a bit scrambled, as well - or just hungry?

Bean, remember, we're here for you any time you can pop in! There are no judgments about how often or how much you can say, so feel free when it's convenient for you, as we'll be here!

Tami, how fortunate for you that your Mom lived close & could come to help with Mitchell! When I had my first, the nurses even had "classes" to help all the new moms discussing baths, feeding, etc., but no lactation specialist the my D's hospital had available.

Theresa, I wish I could send you some sunny, warm (about 75-78* F) weather for you to help ease your arthritis. You're allowed to get down in the dumps, as we all do sometimes. Just know that we're here for you when you're ready to pop in!

WooHoo! June and hubby will soon be going on holiday! I hope you have a WONGERFUL time and get some much-needed relaxation! Sending positive vibes and {{{HUGS}}} for your friend!

Gail, thanks for your very succinct post sending love to so many who can use it right now!

Tami, have you shared your brownie recipe with us yet? Inquiring minds want to know!

Theresa, thank you for sharing the link to learn about your FIL!

Equanimous, I guess you can consider that the shared cuppa with Ebob went well! Thinking of you! It can be mighty difficult (as I know quite well myself), but keep your ears open and your mouth shut and be glad for the crumbs. It's so important to keep that line of communication open, even if it's very one-sided right now! {{{HUGS}}} <3

MizT, I loved your explanation of how to take care of worry! Sounds like good advice, which I will try to implement!

Judy, what difficult news you received! It's great that you can keep your sense of humor in regards to the foil treatments. That WAS humor, right?

Rolanda, they don't call people of our age the sandwich generation for nothing. You're so right, between our kids and our parents, it's a wonder we have any hair left to turn gray!

Cyn, I loved your "ligh

Here's the rest:

Cyn, I loved your "light at the end of the tunnel are just the lights of an oncoming train!"

Well, folks, it's now past 1:30 a.m. and I really must go for now. But first, I want to send heaps and oodles of love, chocolate, (sorry, but Gath's cake smilie is as close as I can come to that), positive vibes, prayers, sympathy, empathy, {{{{{{HUGS}}}}}} and understanding to EVERYONE here at SA9A. You are all very special and deserve to have wonderful easy lives! However, the reality is that life comes at us all hard and fast and we all just do the best we can! Take care, Everyone! I'm off to bed now, so, Good Night!

I'm off home for the weekend.
Big hugs to everyone in need.
Judy I feel your pain. My mother is talking about looking at retirement villages next year. She'll be a not-so-spritely 82 by then! Maybe I'll join her - save my boys the effort.

Rola, Judy, Zusy, Bean, Theresa and CynB(and anyone I have missed), it is all coming from both ends of the barrel!
Warning! Small soapbox episode.
Please my friends, be kind to yourself and try to do what is best for you. Like what MizT said, there is very little that you have an influence over. The rest is others demanding you behave the way they want you to. I know what a struggle it is to come to a compromise in situations like this, especially when you feel that your life is being taken over.
I will tell you about one happy ending I had with my mother...we were so alike and so stubborn! My biggest dread was telling her that I was moving to Queensland from Victoria, I knew there would be fireworks and massive guilt. I stressed over this until a glimmer of hope appeared, so I steeled myself for the onslaught and went and told her that I had finally found a man that would make me as happy as Dad had made her and was moving. Still copped it but not as bad! Do we ever grow up?
OK off my soapbox now.

Cyn, my Mum's favourite answer to the question "Why didn't you warn us about kids?'...
"You wouldn't have listened anyway", and she was right...

Wow missed you all whilst reminiscing

Broni - what a lovely story about what you said to your Mum!
Gail - yep, that's right, we wouldn't have listened!

Vicki - that is fortunate that your Mum is making the decision for herself about a retirement home. My mother had always planned to do that after Dad was gone but she had developed dementia by the time he died, unfortunately. She did go into low care quite happily and had always told us that no matter what happened (I guess she was anticipating dementia like her owm Mum) to just do what had to be done. It made the decision for what to do with her easier.

Hi everyone.
Neither of my parents are alive so I am very lucky not to have to deal with any of this that you all have been going through and have to go through.

{{{{{{{ H U G S }}}}}}}

to all who needed them.


I've also included some flowers and chocolate, hope that helps.

Julie, I will be delighted to share my recipe. I buy whatever box is on sale. I just seem to have the knack of knowing exactly when the brownies need to come out of the oven. I also use a "pampered chef" pan and that seems to make a difference. The pans are expensive but mine is a hand me down. If it ever breaks, I will buy a new one.

Equanimous, glad things went well with Ebob. Keep the communication open, let her call. Those rose colored glasses will eventually crack and she may see the truth.

Niece and Baby are home.

It's funny how a person forgets to pass on good news. Remember last week my sister had her follow-up colonoscopy after her bowel cancer last year. There was a polyp and the doc promised her this one would be OK - it was! All clear! It was the type that never turns into cancer. Woo Hoo!!

Cyn, that is really good news about your sister.
Rolanda, good to hear the Steven Jai and mommy are home and doing well. Give him a big cuddle for me when you see him again.
Just made oatmeal cookies for a party at school. Of course I have to have one (or two) with my morning cup.

Heidi - I meant to ask you - how will your orchids stand up the the cold winters you have there in KY - they are a tropical plant. I know you have your lovely sun-room, has it been built to be a sun-catcher in the winter months?
We have a large, rather thick shade tree in our front yard, our orchids just sit under that summer and winter. They survive and flower year by year with little or no tending from us. We don't even get frosts here.

Shhhh Cyn don't tempt fate, the way the weather has been across the world lately you never know what might happen. Pleased that your sister got great news.
((HUGS)) to everyone who needs them, I am thinking of you all.
Rolanda I'm jealous of you getting to cuddle the baby, I can't remember the last time I held a baby that small. It is nice when you can hand them back though

Broni, I think my parents were pleased when I moved out.. I was nearly 29 when it happened. They made me fr too comfortable. Trouble is my kids can't afford to move out the cost of buying or renting here(where we are in the UK) is so high that even Elaine (26), a teacher, cannot afford her own place.

Cyn, great news about your sister. My orchid lives neglected in the garden but with three flower stalks out this year it is in the sun room at the moment for me to admire the blooms.
Enjoy your cookies Tami. Sounds just right with a cuppa.